The first is “Withdrawal”.
Many retired people, the day they retire from Office withdraw from Life and within a few months they just pass away.
When you ask a Doctor he will tell you I can give a Medical term but this is case of “simple lack of will to live”.
The second time management option is “ritual”.
A person can create a ritual for himself. He gets up at a specific time, does different activities at a specific time and this invariably results in misery for others if that specific time frame is not adhered to. While he has in essence nothing to do, he is trying to make his activities meaningful. This leads to a meaningless ritual.The third option is Pastime.
Many people get together and embark on a combined ritual which is called pastime.
This too does not add to the meaningfulness of life.
The last option turns out to be even mischievous. It is playing games— not physical ones like badminton, tennis but psychological ones where you try to manipulate people, get into their problems, complicate them and generally enlarge the tension around you. Many a respectable person indulges in this and creates problems where none existed.
The alternative to these are Functional options.
The first is become a Consultant.
Lurking inside every executive is a Consultant. But for this considerable expertise is required. All are not Consultants.
The second option is to start your own Business or industry.
But this calls for entrepreneurial qualities which an executive may lack. Many are the cases where lakhs of rupees have turned into thousands!.
The third option is to involve oneself in professional activities.
For this one must build up one’s position even before retirement. Many cliques operate to prevent outsiders from encroachment.
The fourth is to get into spiritual activities.
While nobody is required between you and God, nowadays, we find more and more godmen, swamijis, pseudo Gurus some even US returned. There is a temptation to follow some Swamiji or even become one yourself. This is a very slippery slope. Beware –there are more hoaxes in the religious field than anywhere else!.
The last and most meaningful option is to cultivate a Hobby.
Use your creative abilities and do something that you enjoy doing. You should start this even while in service.
We live in three Boxes.
First is the Box of Learning, which starts from birth and goes on till 20 plus.
Second is the Box of Work which commences at 20 plus and goes on up to 58 or 60—the age of retirement.
Third is the Box of Leisure.
When we are in the Box of Work what is significant is Status, Prestige, Power—all these we aspire for and it is what we get from Life. The more we get ---the happier we are.
The day we retire we move into Box 3—the one of Leisure.
If we have to enjoy this we have to change our psychological position and appreciate creativity, autonomy and integrity. When you were a small child of two or three did status, prestige or money mean anything?
What you wanted was autonomy, creativity. A child is always creative. It enjoys creativity. One example. When visitors come you ask your child, “Pushpa -Sing 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star'”. She will not sing. You shout at her. You tell your visitors proudly she is three only and knows Twelve Nursery songs. The moment the guests are gone and your servant comes for cleaning, your daughter will sing to her all the twelve songs. The child has its own values!
By the time we enter the Box of Work values change. We are not taught to respect our autonomy but fall in line—conformity is the rule. If the son plays the violin his Mother will come and tell him, “Playing the Violin now ?. Study now. Maths is very scoring. If you get centum admission to IIT is easy. Life is competitive, dear son.”
When we enter the Box of Leisure values change.Your psychological position has to be changed. New values of creativity, integrity and autonomy emerge. Hobbies are an excellent way of getting Leisure Value. Everybody must identify his hobby that he can enjoy.
No bother about Power, Prestige and Status.
An individual can live in one box only or interchange or combine the boxes. You can have learning, work and leisure together. One can even take up a hobby that is financially productive. As time passes one learns.
The real problem of retirement is that people refuse to face the problem. The mantra is “Let us cross the bridge when we come to it.” This is not correct. Since we live in three Boxes we must prepare ourselves for crossing from one to the other. Structuring our time is the prime requirement. In the beginning you are contributing to Value. Think of Transfer Value. After retirement you can think of Leisure Value. Develop good hobbies which incorporates your creativity, autonomy and integrity. I have taken to Letter writing. (Rajaji , Kalam and H R F Keating.)
You will lead a happy life. Retirement is not adding “Years to your Life but adding Life to our Years”. Retirement is not a calamity but an opportunity.
I shall advert to some basic qualities one must cultivate.
There are two ways to look at every situation in life. Is the Cup half empty or is the cup half full. One man was not worried about his becoming bald. He declared “I have less hair to comb!”. Another man in identical situation moaned, “I have more face to wash !”.
Always remember that you are loved, even when it does not seem like it.
Believe in yourself and your values.
Don’t sell out when things go wrong.
Don’t let anything get you down. Always bounce back.
Set goals for your future and never settle for anything less.
Realise that there are others in this world with bigger problems than you.
Appreciate the good things of Life. Sunrise, Sunset, Flowers, Birds.
Be thankful for the good times you have with your loved ones.
Spend more time with your family and friends.
Appreciate the simple things of Life and don’t get caught up in the material things of life.
Be an Optimist and see the Cup as being Half Full.
Before long your attitude will rub of on others. You can make the world a better place to live by simply making yourself a happier person.
You will permit me to conclude with an allegorical story.
First God created the Cow and said, “You must go with farmer daily to the field all day long and suffer under the Sun, have calves, give milk and help the farmer. I give you a span of sixty years.” The Cow said, “That’s surely Tough. Give me only twenty years. I give back forty years.”
On Day Two God created the Dog and told him, “Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at strangers. I give you a span of twenty years.” The Dog said, “Too long time for barking. I give up ten years.”
On the third day God created the Monkey and said to him, “Entertain people. Make them laugh. I give you Twenty years.” The Monkey said to God, “How boring, Monkey tricks for twenty years. Give me only Ten years”. Lord agreed.
On the fourth day God created Man. He told him, “Eat, sleep, play, enjoy and do nothing. I will give you twenty years.”
Man said, “Only twenty years. No way. I will take my Twenty and give me the Forty the cow gave back, the Ten that the Monkey returned, and the Ten the Dog surrendered. That makes eighty. O.K ? ”
O.K said God. That is why for the First twenty years we sleep, play enjoy and do nothing.
For the next forty years we slave in the Sun to support our family.
For the next ten years we do Monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren.
And for the last Ten years we sit in front of the house and bark at everybody.
Thank you all.
(Concluded)